Living Now: Coping with changes in the future
Many transplant recipients are surprised to find their emotional and physical recovery aren’t as far along as they expected 2 years after transplant.
Your life is likely very different than it was before transplant. Your relationships may have changed, priorities have shifted and may also be dealing with things like graft-versus-host disease (GVHD), fatigue and chemo brain.
Advice from other transplant recipients
While the road ahead might not always be easy, transplant recipients who have been where you are offer this advice:
Expect a forever life change. Accept that you will have difficulties. Learn to be thankful for each day no matter what.”
tiffany
Transplant recipient
You have to find a way to let go of the life you no longer have in order to be able to embrace the life you do have now.”
esther
Transplant recipient
“Several years after my transplant, I came to a startling realization. I was living my life 70% of what I used to be. I compared virtually everything I did to my pre-sickness self,” says Ted, transplant recipient. “That misguided attitude frequently left me disappointed, overshadowing the amazing gains I had made. From that very moment on, I began living my life 100% of what I am now. Imagine that for a moment and feel the difference. Trust me—do that and it will change your life.”
Planning for the future
When you started your transplant journey, you may have gone from planning for the future to planning day-today. You may find it’s hard to adjust to planning for the future again.
Keep goals small and realistic. Setting a goal and then breaking it down into small steps can help. Revisit and adapt old plans to what you can handle now.
If you’re not ready yet to share your goals with someone else, write them down in a journal and share them when the time is right for you.
Finding coping strategies to carry you forward
Throughout your transplant journey, you likely had many positive strategies to help you cope with the physical and emotional challenges you faced. You’ll be able to use many of those strategies as you begin the next phase of your life.
If you’re not using some of these strategies already, you may find it helpful to:
- Talk to someone you trust. Sometimes just sharing what you’re thinking or feeling can be a big help.
- Start journaling. Many people find it powerful to write down their feelings.
- Connect with other transplant recipients through support groups, one-on-one support like the NMDPSM Peer Connect program or online groups through trusted organizations.
- Get involved with the cause. Some people find it healing to volunteer or raise awareness about transplant.
- Make it a habit to practice meditation, relaxation or deep breathing. Doing these activities every day can help you cope with stress.
- Let your emotions be what they are. You can control your response to an emotion but you can’t control the emotion itself. Know that like all emotions, it will pass. But if one of your emotions sticks around and becomes overwhelming or dominating, talk to your doctor. It may be a sign you may need professional help.
- Look for the silver lining. While no one would say that going through transplant was a good experience, many people find they have a different appreciation for life or a different sense of gratitude than they did before.
Don’t forget to look back on how far you’ve come. You’ve reached your 2-year post-transplant milestone and that’s something to celebrate.